I always had some resistance towards the above statement. My mind couldn’t really accept it.
Yesterday as I was riding the subway towards Times square and looked at the people around me, I felt a deep love and gratitude for our common humanity.
Then it all made sense.
I remembered back to an incident couple weeks ago. With a buddy of mine we were sitting in a restaurant overlooking beautiful Lisbon on a sunny day.
At the balcony under us, we saw couple guys, and three of them bullied each other. It started as a joke for them, but we could feel the tension going up between them.
And we realized we were talking pretty judgmentally about one of the guys who seemed like the main bully. Then we were like ‘how about we show compassion and love towards him instead.’
After a minute of fighting our inner battle judging our own judgments, and ourselves because of it, my friend said “It’s hard.”
That moment I dropped out of my own personal thinking, and I just looked at the situation being in the moment, as an observer. Directing my awareness to what is, instead of my own thinking about it.
Shortly after that a burst of love, compassion and understanding arose within me.
I could perceive the situation and the guys there without my own projections, and see the human condition in action.
Basically we all get lost in insecure thinking, and then many times we are not acting the most supporting ways.
Either in our relationships, work, or other areas in life.
That guy when he has a clear, secure state of mind, he is not a bully, he is a normal human being.
Judging him based on his behavior coming from his current state of mind, doesn’t serve any of us.
And yesterday as I was on the subway this all made sense on a deeper level.
Our mind can’t really make sense of love, as real unconditional love is beyond the small mind, it’s beyond expectations, judgments, and other projections.
When we drop out of our own personal thinking and drop into the moment, into pure awareness, then we can naturally experience love, compassion, well-being, and understanding.
Being in a clear state of mind, with pure awareness, we perceive things as they are.
It’s not good, not bad.
It is as it is. What Byron Katie points to with the statement “Loving what is.”
And when we drop out of our own projections, and experience more clarity, we are naturally able to respond to a situation or a person’s behavior in more supportive ways.
Instead of blaming the person and coming from judgments, we come from love, compassion, and understanding, and point out things to the person that might be useful for the situation.
Here is the catch though. When we are caught up in our own personal thinking, we can’t see it, nor understand it. Then it seems like we need to DO something to love what is, to accept what is.
When our mind clears, we ARE it. We don’t have to DO anything, just BE it, which we always are, just our thinking covers up that love and acceptance.
Love really is our true essence. Not the love the small mind thinks of (which is based on concepts, and expectations), but love which is beyond that.
The acceptance of what is, being with what is, seeing things as they are.